Gina Ruppert
Gina Ruppert, Revelation
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I am an intuitive, self taught artist whose aesthetic focus
is primarily on the female form as a means to illustrate what
is going on in my head and heart. I began painting on a whim
in October of 2003 after having a conversation with a close
friend on the phone. My life began to take a new turn as I continued
to paint, relying on memories of what I was taught in my ninth
grade art class, which is the only formal education in art that
I have.
My work changed my life. At first, painting alleviated the
oftentimes overwhelming senses of homesickness and isolation.
Putting into visual form the flotsam and jetsam of the thoughts
in my head gave me something tangible with which I could stand
back from myself and have a visual image of my internal self.
Through my work I have taken huge steps on the path of recovery
from childhood sexual abuse. By opening up completely about
this part of myself I have be rewarded by invaluable opportunities
to show my work, and to have in my life, the incredible group
of people that I have met because of it. The inner demons
that were once so prevalent; insecurity, fear, jealousy, anxiety,
apprehension, and cowardice are for the most part, gone. Yet,
I am still a very human work in progress, who is looking forward
to the long journey in front of me. Through the process of
my work I have finally found the grace within myself to forgive
myself for all of my mistakes, absolution in knowing that
I did the best I could at the time with what I had, and the
sense of elation that I can and am, finally moving forward.
Painting for me is a way of journaling. What is going on
in my life, what I am reading, what I am challenged with,
and what I am thinking abut is directly reflected in my work.
For example, the experiences of the past summer had led to
an interesting and unexpected change of course in my work.
Rather than focus primarily of broad sweeping “she-scapes”
with large brushes, that were painted on my front porch, I’ve
moved into a much more intense process. I now work in my basement
surrounded by my books and dolls. After having someone break
into my car, and mourning the loss, and dealing with the sense
of betrayal over a dear and close friend, I felt overexposed
and needed to move inward. I also felt the need to isolate
and focus on my family and my work. I now work on smaller
surfaces with tiny brushes and take up to three months or
longer for one painting.
Gina Ruppert, Exquisite Corpse
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Gina Ruppert, Blue Circle
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 I
have come to think that creating art is the act of transcending
my subjective individual reality into a symbolic, visual language.
This translates into my saying that this is my reality. It
may not be pretty, and it may not be what anyone would want
to see. But it is what it is. Sometimes healing is messy,
and a lot of work. But the final outcome is truly a thing
of beauty. Many, many times I cannot translate my own work
as it comes from a place inside of my that I do not understand.
My paintings simply happen. It is difficult for me to talk
about what I do, since I lack the vocabulary to describe the
experience. For me, painting has become an act of mythmaking
to give me an opportunity to answer some questions as to why
I exist, why I have suffered, and why am I here. Yet, ironically,
as I continue to work, my experiences with my paintings only
raise more questions, rather than give answers. Fundamentally,
my art is a way of me reclaiming myself from the man who abused
me. In spite of him and what he attempted to do to me and
ultimately failed at, I am still here. In a way through my
healing process I have died a symbolic death. The victim who
lived in shame is gone, and from the decay of that death has
come a beautiful new life of someone who is a survivor.
View
the artist's 2005 Art of Recovery work
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